“OK, Lord, this is Your classroom.”
That might make you think that I am a very holy teacher. Trustingly surrendering my classroom to the Divine Teacher and allowing Him to work through me.
In truth, that was a prayer murmured out of necessity. A final spiritual dropping to my knees and surrendering out of the inability to do anything else. It was the first day of a new semester and I was becoming nervous again at the prospect of being scrutinized by new seniors with the inevitable assessment of found wanting. My emotional transition to a new home wasn’t really playing in my favor and to make it a bit more challenging, I forgot my school bag. Of course I remembered to bring my prayer journal, Bible, cell phone, and prayer materials. However, I had completely neglected to bring my computer with my introduction PowerPoint and a fun brain activity for them to go through.
At 7:30 in the morning outside my car in the school parking lot, I frantically thought of racing home (15 minutes away) and back to school with my computer. It was possible, though, that I would come to school late–something I am certain would have led to a melt-down. Yet if I managed to not be late, I would assuredly come in panicked and short of breath. This was not a good beginning.
It was here, in the midst of panic and stress that I “surrendered” my class to the Lord. I realized, as I prayed this silent prayer, that it was because my own means had failed that I was giving God the reins. If I would have had my computer with the PowerPoint filled with cute family pictures, I would have started the semester in a state of semi-confidence. Instead, the Lord was given control at the last minute.
This image just come to mind as a plausible analogy of what I did:
I’m in a car driving. Then the roads get slippery. My omniscient, omnipotent passenger asks if He can help. But I’ve got it. All of sudden the car is careening toward a cliff or an oncoming semi and just when I’m about to slip over the edge or be crushed, I pull my hands from the steering wheel, cradle my head in my hands, and shout, “Fine! Take over!”
I felt a little guilty surrendering my classroom only after all my plans had failed. Perhaps it is a lesson for the semester. I am not in control. It is better to just give God my classroom and myself right now instead of waiting until things are crashing and burning all around me.
My goal for this brand new semester is to take the passenger seat and allow God to dictate my classes. Not once I tried my way and it failed. But His way, always His way.
Who knows—maybe God will have a better method than me.